the "how did you meet" BLOW OFF

A couple weeks ago, we had two very different posts that touched on the whole "how did you meet" element of a relationship.  20 LA Wannabe gave us a rundown of the latest trends in dating apps and posed the question of whether apps had less (or more) stigma than meeting someone online.  We also had a pretty incredible guest post from one of our loyal readers who was admittedly having a difficult time ending things with a guy, partially because the story of how they met was so amazing (airport bar, she ran from her gate back to the bar to exchange info.)  Both these posts made me realize just how much importance we place on the meeting portion of a relationship.

At its worst, meeting someone online feels forced or unromantic or desperate.  At its best, meeting someone in an airport feels fated and epic and right out of a movie.

How It Really Feels to Blow Off Someone You Love

Here at the The Blow Off, a lot of time is spent talking about being blown off, but not as much time is dedicated to those that do the blowing off. Admittedly, the instigator is not as blindsided, or in need, as the recipient. Nor do they always deserve sympathy. That's not to say that they are heartless, inconsiderate assholes - at least I hope not.

I've spent a lot of my time "blowing off" girls, but, in a much more diplomatic term, "breaking up" with girls has never been easy for me. I remember the first time I broke up with a girl in the 8th grade and I remember thinking it wouldn't be that difficult. What I didn't foresee was being so affected by the reaction. Once she started crying, I couldn't believe I could cause such pain in a person. It was a profound and startling feeling. You often hear about empowerment in a positive way, but there was no such connotation here. I never wanted to break up with a girl again. Which may explain my reluctance – to this day – to even get into a relationship.

Four Things Friday: The Variety Pack

crepes, WTF podcast, Vine app, Romy & Michelle

I don't know if I was just having an off week, but I had a hard time coming up with four things for this post.  So, this is kind of a mish-mash of stuff I'm into right now with no cohesive theme whatsoever. If any of you loyal readers wants to curate your own Four Things Friday, make sure to email us at theblowoffwtf@gmail.com.  Anyway, I hope you all have a wonderful weekend and that you celebrate your dads in style.  I won't be able to make it up to the Bay Area to see mine for Father's Day, but I have to give him a special shout out.  He's the rare kind of dad that listened to a lot of my break up stories growing up.  And he always made me a martini or a gin & tonic to help me get through it.  Love you, baba!

BLOW OFF song of the day: Boys of Summer by Don Henley

June means it's officially summer, which means summer break up songs!



I never will forget those nights
I wonder if it was a dream
Remember how you made me crazy?
Remember how I made you scream
Now I don't understand what happened to our love
But babe, when I get you back
I'm gonna show you what I'm made of

I can see you-
Your brown skin shinin' in the sun
I see you walkin' real slow and you're smilin' at everyone
I can tell you my love for you will still be strong
After the boys of summer have gone
-Don Henley, 1984

How Do You Break Up With Your F*ck Buddy?

How do you break up with your f*ck buddy?  This isn't so much a how-to post, it's more of a how do I do this post.  I don't want to have a f*ck buddy...I need one.  Of course I'd prefer to be in a relationship.

Some people argue that when you're filling your time up with someone that's wrong for you it doesn't leave room for someone good to come into your life.  But there have been plenty of times that I have foregone having a f*ck buddy and no one good still came into my life.  So I was alone, stressed and sexually frustrated.  Plus, I'm a very sexual person so when I'm already having sex with someone where there's no potential for a relationship, it curbs my sex drive so I don't jump into bed with a guy that I'm dating that I like too soon.

the bachelorette & the BLOW OFF: episode 3

This episode was cray-cray for a variety of reasons.  I will say it was much improved from last week (aside from the ridiculously long Lone Ranger commercial, we'll get to that later) but lots of shit went down.  The show begins with Chris Harrison arriving to the Herpes House to deliver the first date card.  I could be totally wrong here, but the format this week actually was a little different.  Instead of two one-on-one dates and one group date, we got two group dates and only one one-on-one date?  You follow?  Honestly, I could barely make sense of anything that was going on throughout the show due to this change.  It was like the whole thing was in Cantonese.