Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Glossary of a BLOW OFF: The Summit

Part of speech: noun

Definition: A companion to the SOTUA, a Summit is when you and your significant other are trying to come to an agreement on difficult issues in the relationship. They usually involve the larger questions of “Are we ready to step it up a level?” “Are we on the same timeline?” “Do we have the same life goals?” It is helpful, but not necessary to hold the summit at a neutral location.

Summits are excruciating because they are fraught with risk. Complete honesty is a necessity, which may, at any moment reveal an unbridgeable difference. A breakdown in negotiations and a rethinking of the entire relationship ensues. For example, if you want kids and he doesn’t (or vice/versa) – you have a problem. A big one. No matter how much fun you have, how great your chemistry is, how much you connect on multiple levels, etc., etc. will change that fundamental difference. And unless one person is prepared to give in, the relationship pretty much has to end. Like I said, excruciating.

On the other hand, the two parties may find there is a lot of agreement, and small changes just need to be made around the edges. I think at the end of the day, you have to lay all the cards on the table and trust that the outcome will be ultimately positive – even if it doesn’t seem like it at the time. Hey, if the US and Russia can come to an agreement on arms reduction, there’s hope for the rest of us, right?

1 comment:

  1. Hmmm...Are summits a bigger deal when we are younger and are less likely to compromise (and stick to what we think/we know/we want), or less important as we get older and wise and realize what things are more important than others?

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