Monday, July 26, 2010

The Editor of This Blog Blew Us Off Blow Off

It's Bachelorette night, and ordinarily, I'd be the spoken for gay guy sandwiched in between a whole bunch of straight girls who don't much care for Ali and her whiny ways — and care for that loser Frank that dropped her last week even less.

But tonight, alas, it's down to two Bachelorette viewers. Myself, who just started watching two weeks ago after two too many glasses of wine and the promise of promiscuous sex and TV tears, and Achoochu, who is currently cooking us up a mean meal.

One of the girl gaggle has strep throat — which SUCKS! Saaara, who edits this blog and on a typical Monday would be sitting on the Choochu couch blogging up a storm at this point, is 3,000 miles away somewhere on the east coast, leaving us to spew volatile comments at this Bachelorette chick on our own. No running commentary. No play by play recaps from her diligent notes. With any luck, we'll get to read over her thoughts on this blog in the morning, but for right now, we're own our own.

Thanks a lot.

Like I'd be into this shit if it wasn't for you girls. Blown off for sickness and a summer vaca. I see how it is. You people lure me into this Bachelorette trap, suck me back into my days of consoling sorority girls over tacos after a frat party gone awry, and then as soon as I'm hooked, you leave, one by one. It's like "Ten Little Indians," only at the end, nobody dies. They just win a honeymoon to Tahiti, land on the cover of OK! Magazine and, six months later, break up on The Wendy Williams Show in some tragic display of emotion that makes even me want to hurl my television set through the window.

I hate you for blowing me off in the eleventh hour... the penultimate episode. I would have been just fine on my own watching episodes of "Rupaul's Drag U," but oh no. Now I'm honorary straight girl, addicted to this loser like crack cocaine.

This sucks. And it hurts.

And it's starting so Achoochu and I are taking our Tandori chicken and hitting the couch.

1 comment:

  1. omg, this post is hilarious! I am sorry I abandoned you guys last night, but i will be there next Monday come hell or high water. Also, i haven't even seen the men tell all yet!