Wednesday, September 15, 2010

the hollywood wingmen: are these guys for real?

Maybe I've been living under a rock, but apparently in my own city of Los Angeles there's an actual wingmen service...a place where dudes can go to get tips on how to "attract the woman of their dream." No, this is not the plot of a romantic comedy starring Will Smith. This is real.

The company, Hollywood Wingmen, was started by Dr. Ofer Batt who's only qualifications from his bio are that he traveled through 40 different countries meeting beautiful women. Big whoop! Who hasn't met a lot of attractive people in their lifetime? What's important is if Ofer actually bagged them. Anyway, apparently the guy has some idea of what he's talking about, because he just published a book called "How to Succeed with Women Without Being Weird: A Practical Guide to Dating." I like the title, but I'm still a bit suspect. I mean, if these guys really had it going on, they'd have a reality show by now, right?

Plus, the two experts on the site, Ofer and VJ, are frankly a little dorky and douchey. But I suppose that's the point? I mean, if they looked like Brad Pitt then their clients wouldn't be all like "easy for you to say dude, you look like Brad Pitt."

Anyway, here are the services they offer:

$120: Private coaching sessions where a Hollywood Wingman will take you to different venues so you can try out the skills they've taught you on unsuspecting women.

$20: Thirty minutes of phone coaching. For the guy with general coaching questions or an immediate problem to tackle.

$9: Email consultations. You can ask up to two questions per email on how to get laid.

Fashion consultation service with Michelle Sterling: There's no price listed for this, but I watched her little youtube video and I can already tell you she's going to make you dress like a boring investment banker.

Now, get this!!!: The first interested guy that emails us at theblowoffwtf@gmail.com will be treated to any of the above services BUT you have to write about your experience for the blog. (I'm dead serious)

OR even better. We're proud to announce the Blow Off's competitive rates:

Fish tacos, six pack of beer of our choice, In & Out double double: One hour counseling session over beers and fish tacos on what you're doing wrong with the female gender. You will then drive me to In & Out burger where I will eat a double double, while you try out my tips on the ladies.

Dark chocolate and The Notebook on DVD: I will talk to you on the phone for 30 minutes about what a loser you are when it comes to women, then I will teach you the ways of Noah Calhoun, while we both eat dark chocolate.

Pedicure: You buy me a pedicure, then text me your dating questions from the next chair, while I get my feet scrubbed.

Fashion Consultation Service: This one is free. All you need to know is "do not wear Ed Hardy."

Major credit cards, cash, gold, bacon wrapped hot dogs, and monopoly money also accepted. Come on boys, let's get you laid!

4 comments:

  1. I accept your offer.. not from the wingman service, but from your input. Let's get some In 'N Out! When can I set up an appointment? You're closer to my target demographic than douchebag guys who have a wingman service.

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  2. Here are some lines I've been working on when we go to In 'N Out --
    1) well, hello ladies. can i get you some in 'n out... if you know what i mean.
    2) well, hello ladies. they only serve hamburgers here but i've got a hot dog stand... if you know what i mean.
    3) well, hello ladies. i got your animal-style right here...
    4) well, hello ladies. my those are nice double doubles... if you know what i mean.

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  3. OMG, TN--- these lines are hilarious!!!! I love them all. If you used 1-4 on me, I would marry you and have your babies. I don't know if I could teach you anything, you're a genius!

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  4. My brother and I met these two clowns back when we were in LA. They brag about how they get laid with a few women a day while they hold multiple other longer term relationships. The tall one kept on hitting on women even while speaking to us. They went on and on about women being insecure and hinted that they are unsophisticated or flat out stupid. My brother got the book, read some of it and reached the same conclusion I did jst by hearing these two without wasting time reading it.

    ReplyDelete