Friday, September 24, 2010

the I hate your boyfriend BLOW OFF

We've all been there: your best friend just met a new great guy that she's excited about and then you meet him in person...and you don't like him. You decide to give him a few more chances and you still don't like him. What the fuck do you do? Suck it up or tell her she's embarking on a huge mistake?

I've been on both sides of the coin--- dated guys I've suspected some of my friends were not crazy about and purchased wedding gifts for relationships I did not support. Both situations kind of suck.

Recently, a friend of mine---when talking about another friend's significant other--- described him as "her favorite guy of any of the guys we'd all dated." Basically, she was saying: I like him better than your boyfriend. Ouch.

Back in the day, my roommate and I had multiple arguments over her boyfriend. He rubbed me the wrong way. I didn't find him very friendly and I found it annoying that he never made small gestures to win her friends over like buy us a round of drinks (even though we'd buy him one) or put the toilet seat down. Sounds petty, but those are the little things a guy can do to endear himself to his gf's friends. Plus, it was hard being single with them hanging out in our tiny apartment all the time (especially since he had his own place). I'll admit: if I wasn't feeling lonely, I may not have cared as much.

The shit hit the fan one day when I was lounging on the couch watching a movie and enjoying having the apartment to myself. They got home and had just rented a movie...i.e. I had to stop doing what I was doing. Now, this is where my immaturity comes in. I could have sucked it up and watched a movie with them, but instead I went into my room and slammed the door. (In my defense, the idea of them cuddling on one end on the couch and me sitting on the other end wasn't all that appealing.)

We got into a be all and end all fight that ended like all fights with your best friend should...with a hug and an I love you and I'm sorry. After that, I tried my best to keep an open mind, but I was secretly relieved when he left for grad school in Europe. I hated to see her sad, but I knew in my heart of hearts that there was a better guy out there for her. And there was. I love her current boyfriend. And I can blog about this now, because it's all water under the bridge.

There is a silver lining here...when it comes to those significant others we just don't connect with...look on the bright side: it could be worse. Your best friend could be in love with Spencer Pratt.


  1. Ugh, I'm in a similar situation but it's my male roommate dating a girl so there would be no hug and tears at the end - only him taking her side until the end of time.

    She's nice enough but they're not friendly as a couple. Does that make sense?

  2. Totally makes sense! Fun couples to hang out with can be rare. there should be a class for "how to not be an annoying couple."

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