Thursday, August 25, 2011

the tall groom BLOW OFF

Okay, I loathe to write anything about Kim Kardashian's wedding, because I am still having a lot of trouble comprehending why she's so outrageously famous. I mean, the woman is way beyond reality TV star famous. She was paid $1.5 million for exclusive photos of her wedding. No one is paying Audrina Partridge that kind of dough. And the fact that some members of the media have called this America's version of the royal wedding is one of the many reminders of why people around the world HATE America. But...that said, we must discuss the fact that her HUSBAND was left completely off the cover of People Magazine.

This is not a good start to their relationship. Men don't do well with woman that constantly upstage them. And let's safely assume that Kim and her entourage planned this entire wedding and Kris Humphries was just told when to propose and when to show up and what to wear, but isn't there something odd about a wedding photo without the groom? Or maybe this People Magazine cover should be the ultimate feminist manifesto. A wedding shot where the husband is so totally unnecessary.

I love that People Magazine's quote about the solo shot is as follows: "He's got a little height on her. It's kind of tough to get them in the (same) shot." Hmmmm. I'm five feet tall and my future partner in monogamy is 6'2", but we have plenty of un-photoshopped pictures where we still fit in the same frame. And what about the fact that Ok! was able to fit a shot of Khloe Kardashian with Lamar Odom-- who at 6'10" is one inch taller than Humphries?

Me thinks Mama Kardashian specified that only Kim would be on the cover. And that if anyone asked, they'd blame it on the whole tall person deformity. Personally, if they really wanted to sell magazines, the whole cover should have been a shot of Kim's ass. I would totally shell out $4.95 for that cellulite castle.

*Side note. Kris Humphries is totally 26. Way too young for any man to get married. I give this marriage one year, tops.

1 comment:

  1. i heard from someone working the wedding that lindsay lohan "was not looking her best." my reaction: who the fuck would invite her?