Monday, February 6, 2012

the "you don't know what you have till it's gone" BLOW OFF

Holy crap, just when I thought I had nothing left to say about break ups, I realize there's this GIANT aspect of a BLOW OFF that we've failed to adequately dissect.


People. If you're going to break up with someone, don't just make sure you're 100% certain about it, make sure you're like 100,000% certain. Like, I almost think you should wait until the thought of being touched by that person makes you physically ill. And even after that, give it one more month. I know it's not healthy to drag out a break up, but there's nothing worse than doing irreparable damage to another person, only to realize you made a completely rash decision. This happens all the time. We break up with someone, because things get "hard" but then we're absolutely not prepared for what the aftermath will bring. It's a cliche, because it's true. Sometimes you don't know what you had 'til you've taken a giant shit all over it.

That's why a lot of people end up getting back together post BLOW OFF. It takes going back to our pre-relationship life to remember that life totally sucked. And now it's going to suck even more-- because we've tasted what it's like on the other side. You knew what it feels like to be truly happy. And what's worse? You were the idiot that tossed it all aside.

As the Bachelor Ben F would say: tread lightly. If you're lucky, maybe the person's whose heart you skewered will miss you enough to forgive you. But if they don't? You will probably die alone. In a nursing home. With no one to tell you stories of the life you had together when you get dementia.

So, I repeat-- are you sure you want to break up?

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