Monday, April 2, 2012

kelly kapowski and jessie spano take a break

When girls fight it is usually-most likely-always due to the attention of a boy or lack of. Even highly intelligent professional women such as you and I might find reasons to deny trivial man related matters but it all points back to these basic scenarios:

-you’re always spending so much time with ________. (even though you're likely to throw over your friends too during the honeymoon period, but it doesn't mean it's right)
-uhm, why would you give him your number if you knew I sorta liked him. (said silently & passive aggressively in your head)
-I can’t believe you are blowing me off for that scum bag, did you forget he fucking cheated on you? (no win situation)
-we’re just friends, you can totally date him. (don't say it unless you really really really mean it)
-isn’t it enough she throws herself at every guy, now she’s stealing my gay boyfriend. (woe is me, common let's all hate on her)
-I just don’t want you to get hurt. (I know he doesn't like you but I don't know how to tell you...)

I thought I was above these petty jealous arguments I'd heard about, I thought me and my girlfriends would never break the bonds of sisterhood in sweat pants. Until recently when I tried to figure out why one of my sister friends got mad at me for trying to help her....

A lot has changed since high school but personality traits stay with us for a long time. There are 2 types of girls in the world, the Kelly Kapowskis and the Jessie Spanos. We all embody a little of both, but Kelly is the always innocent perhaps prettier (and sometimes the less attractive one) bystander who has no idea why anyone’s upset with her (in her head she didn’t intentionally do anything wrong). And Jessie is the all knowing dominating class president who diligently decides who’s in the wrong and why (in her head, even if she’s done something wrong, it’s because of someone else). Of course both Kelly and Jessie have revelations once in awhile and say sorry when they know it’s the right thing to do. Other times, Kelly and Jessie just stay mad at each other - which can last between a week or forever when I think about certain former female comrades.

Flash forward to present day, it started out with some harsh words about an incident that had nothing to do with the guy who was there, but of course it’s about the guy who was there...and every other guy who has passed through our friendship and left resentment for one reason or another. As much as I’d like to believe we’re the superior sex, our behavior suggests otherwise. And I do take responsibility for my share of pride and ego which only allows me to say sorry to a certain extent. As a result, me and my dear friend of over 15 years are taking a break from each other (on her suggestion). I can hardly imagine Zack and Slater telling each other they’ve hurt the other person’s feelings and they need time to themselves now.


  1. Love this post! I will say I've definitely felt the need to take breaks from friends or have some space, but I've never actually told them that. I want to know what happens once you guys get back together.

  2. I don't know if I'm Kelly or Jessie!!!

  3. Oy. I think I'm Jessie. Although, I've gotten much better at admitting when I'm the one that's done something wrong.