Thursday, April 12, 2012

the same boy blew twice

A few weeks ago I asked out a younger guy, easing myself into rebound-land. Just knowing he’s younger diminished any sense of real attachment, just what the love doctor would prescribe but probably frowned upon by my real life therapist. Anyway, we coordinated through text and then the night before our “meet up” (I’m not going to humor myself by saying date, because it wasn’t) I didn’t hear from him at all. Ok God, you must have a plan if you think this is going to help me become a stronger woman. I let go of it and I actually felt like a decent human being.

Exactly a week later this young lad texted he was sorry because some personal issues came up so I thought why not give him a second chance. We coordinated again, now it seemed all set. Oh wait, I forgot this is Los Angeles!!! Where seemingly nice guys can blow your ass off the last minute because they don’t want to drive 45 minutes to meet up with you. Here's the text he sent:

Just got done. So much traffic out. I hate to ask you this but can we reschedule? I calculated the trip from my place to Santa Monica and will take about 45 min. I just got back from LA in traffic. Maybe we can meet halfway during the week. Sorry again.

Cool. Got it.

I’m not going to lie, now I’m a little upset and texted all my girlfriends. Here are some of the best responses:

A____: Fuck him. Don’t even write back. It takes 45min to get anywhere in LA. What a loser

B____: Barf all over his face. Homey don’t play that. NEXT!

J____: Fuck. That. Seriously,....(sorry, I had to edit because of inside joke here but the rest is profound).....champs aren’t the ones that always have good luck and no bummers. Champs are the ones that bounce back quickly.

T____: We are so over men Like I try to give them a chance and they’re all the same. Just varying differences of suck

Dear readers, I know this isn’t the worst double blow off scenario, but ladies you sympathize with me on the getting ready/anticipation/perhaps even blowing some other person off for the date sacrifices. As if break ups aren’t bad enough, now I’m forced to reconsider rebound options. Is it LA? Find someone even younger? Should I move to Portland?


  1. what a douche bag! i hate this guy. Can't people come up with better reasons for breaking dates? That's just pure laziness. i think it's a blessing though. he's totally the type of guy that would not help you clean or cook if you lived together.

  2. and ask me to borrow money for his lunchables

  3. hahahaha, omg. yes. but it would probably be like the generic Ralph's brand of lunchables.