Wednesday, August 29, 2012

why you should get back together (take that, Taylor Swift)

I used to believe that getting back together with an ex was a HUGE mistake.  Which is precisely why when the high school BF showed up at my dorm room on Valentine's Day with chocolate and a ring from the movie The Crow, I refused to get back together.  Our break up sucked and I was finally getting over it, why risk having to deal with heartbreak all over again?  So, I sent him on his way (the next morning.)

But now that I'm oh so much older and wiser, I think reuniting with an ex is actually a good thing.  Here's why:

Either they are the person you're supposed to spend the rest of your life with.  (Just take a survey of most married people to see how many of them actually broke up at least once before getting married.)


They are going to fuck you over yet again in such a monumental way that you will never spend another second of your time wondering what could have been, because now you know.  (More on the topic of "what could have been" in a future post.)

Here are some scenarios where you should definitely consider a reunion:

*Your break up was purely circumstantial-- as in, one person had to move and you didn't want to do long distance.  Suddenly, you are now living in the same city.  Get to boning, stat!

*You were way too young when you first dated.  Like high school young.  And now you're nearing that age where all your vacation time and money is spent on going to weddings.  Get back together and get married, stat!

*You've literally continued to think about this person every single day since your break up and you have recurring dreams of them confessing their love to you and begging for you back.  And now it's happening in real life.  This ain't Inception, get back together already!

*They are named Ryan Gosling and you are named Rachel McAdams.

*Your break up was really amicable and you still hang out and your Facebook profile still says you're in a relationship.

Here are some scenarios where you should definitely NOT consider a reunion:

*Your ex beat your face in.  (Yes, Rihanna.  I'm talking to you.)

*This would be like your fourth go round to see if you can make a relationship work.  You can't!  WTF are you waiting for, create your online dating profile NOW.

*Your ex is now in a serious relationship, but claims they aren't happy and that he'd way rather be inside you.  This is when it can become really tempting to be the other woman (or man). We feel like it's justified, because we were with that person first.  But seriously, that's bull shit.  Have some self respect and sleep with his best friend instead.

*Your break up was a fucking shit show.  Sometimes you can find out more about a person from the way they treat you during a break up than the way they treated you when you were actually dating.  If your break up was a fat giant mess, then do your friends and family a favor for enduring you at your worst, and DO NOT get back together.

What do you guys think: yay or nay on the whole dating an ex again?  Comment below!


  1. what happens when you want to get back together and the other person isn't coming back though? how do you feel about making the move if they were the one to cool things off? desperate or trying to make sure they aren't the one even though you can't stop thinking about them?

  2. I feel like it never hurts to try-- especially since you really don't have a whole lot to lose. Might as well put yourself out there rather than wonder five years from now what would have happened if you just admitted how you felt about the person. But i guess i would only lay things on the line once and if i don't get the response i'm looking for, it's time to move on.

  3. I was just thinking about how so many married people have taken "breaks" in their past! I scored 2 out of 5 on reasons to get back together.