Thursday, July 18, 2013

I'm Turning 30: The 3 Month Countdown

It's happening.  I'm turning thirty in three months.  I know the question on everyone's mind, "Are you going to change your name to 30 LA Wannabe?"  No.  I still feel twenty-two, still look twenty-three, and make the same mistakes as girls in their twenties so I'm keeping my handle and there's nothing you can do to stop me. I'm also still in denial that I'm turning the big three-oh.  I take comfort in former Real Housewives of Orange County cast member Jeanea Keough's thoughts on age.  I'll paraphrase here but she said something to the affect of if you aren't getting any older there's a reason for it, you're dead.

Let me say that I was never the girl that said "I want to be married by the time I'm twenty-five and have at least one child by the time I'm thirty."  I've always been more career-oriented than relationship/marriage oriented though I want to have a successful adult (key word being adult) relationship and get married.  But my fear about turning thirty has much more to do with my success or lack there of at my age. But is that okay?  I work hard and I know that, but I feel like at thirty I should have more to show for my work than I currently do.  I didn't really start to freak out until my friend asked me if I'd considered freezing my eggs as she saw Kim and Khloe at a fertility clinic on a rerun of Keeping Up With The Kardashians.

Um excuse me?  Is this something I really need to be concerned with at thirty?  Is it?  Or am I just living in a perpetual state of denial.  It did make me realize that I need to put more stock in my personal life.  Careers rarely make someone happy.  They may for awhile but when it's your whole world that doesn't lead to a happy, healthy path either.  Aside from the fact that I think me having to contemplate freezing my eggs right now is ridiculous, at three months out from this milestone I'm seeing my life from a different perspective.  I've decided to start prioritizing my personal life and that means making some changes and putting myself out there.  As some of you know, I read Tracy McMillan's book Why You're Not Married...Yet but that was like the amuse-bouche for all of the work I need to do. 

Right now it's all still a bit of a hodge podge.  I have the big ideas down.  Find my soulmate, have kids, enjoy the "LA" lifestyle less, and still maintain my ambition...Hopefully as thirty comes closer I will have a more clear idea on what exactly I should be doing to get these goals on track.  But for now I will still roll my eyes when one of my friends asks me what I want to do to celebrate.

Is there anything you guys think that I NEED to know before I hit thirty?  Did you make any significant changes in your life before your thirtieth birthday?

XO,
Wannabe

2 comments:

  1. giiiiirl. you are FINE!

    i'm tired of the fear put on turning 30! i think we should all have goals for SURE, both short and long term but 30 is too early in life for some of the longer term goals.

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  2. i totally agree that the alternative to getting old is being dead, so we should just embrace it. I was a little disappointed that I wasn't suddenly more confident and secure in my thirties the way everyone made it sound like I would be-- there's still some residual 20something confusion that follows you. And the sad part is no longer feeling like you're a wunderkind-- like no one will look at your success moving forward and say "wow, and at such a young age." That's reserved for 25 year olds. BUT all that depressing stuff aside, it does give you a huge kick in the butt to get moving on certain goals and that's a good thing. I quit my job at 29 because I couldn't deal with working there by 30. as far as the relationship stuff goes, once you do find someone and settle down, you will be so happy you spent all of your twenties dating!

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