Thursday, July 4, 2013

the 4th of July Break-Up Hangover

Happy Independence Day everyone!

A friend of mine recently shared a 4th of July Break Up story with me that I think is a great guide for what NOT to do after a break up.  This was about five years ago when he had just gotten out of a very serious relationship, was still going through the motions, while pretending like he was totally okay.  Let's call him: Patrick. 

#1 Don't go on a party crawl.
In order to avoid thinking about his ex, Patrick decided to spend all of 4th of July party hopping.  He got really, really drunk...

#2 Don't do Ecstasy
Which is why he thought it would be a good idea to do Ecstasy when a bunch of friends offered him some at the last party of the night.  He spent the rest of the night in a hot tub getting a toe massage  from some girl in a Star Spangled Banner bikini.  Which was good, because at least he was still not thinking about his ex-girlfriend.  

#3 Don't go to a party in Westwood with a bunch of couples.
But then the following day after doing ecstasy, Patrick's seratonin levels were way down and he started to feel depressed.  "It's just because you did E last night" he kept telling himself.  It had nothing to do with the ex and everything to do with the X.  He thought as long as he kept the socializing going he'd be fine.  So he went to a friend's party in Westwood only to realize he was the only single guy in a sea of couples who were all wearing clothing courtesy of The Gap and Tommy Bahama.  

#4 If you are going to play Rock Star with a bunch of couples then by God, avoid Radiohead. 
Patrick decided to make the best of it and when everyone started playing Rock Star (this is back when that was the thing to do) a couple took him under their wing and let him join their group.  He decided to sing Creep by Radiohead and everything was going fine and Patrick still wasn't thinking about his ex until...he could feel himself start to cry.  And even though the party guests were impressed by how well he nailed the emotion of the song, as soon as he was done singing it, he went straight home and finally faced his break up.  Eventually, he and his ex would get back together again but ended things a second time last year.   And even though he's bounced back from it, this 4th of July, he promises to steer clear of X, Couples, and Creep by Radiohead.


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