Monday, July 15, 2013

the "why wait?" BLOW OFF

There are two kinds of couples: those that rush into relationship milestones (saying "I love you", moving in together, getting married) and those that slow their roll when it comes to those steps.  The H-bomb and I are definitely the latter of the two categories.  Here's our relationship timeline in a nutshell:

Novemeber 2005: start dating long distance.
February 2006: He drops the L word.  I reciprocate.
September 2006: He moves to LA.
February 2009: We move in together.
September 2010: We get engaged.
September 2011: We get married.
October 2011: We got a dog. 

Miraculously, we were always on the same page when it came to the above and maybe that was part of the reason our relationship worked out.  I realize, the average relationship probably moves at twice the speed, but what about the ones that go from zero to sixty pretty quickly?  For instance, a friend of mine eloped a couple months ago after dating for her boyfriend for a year.  When it came to getting hitched or holding off-- her perspective was "why wait"? 

Having taken the slow route, I guess my response to that is the longer you get to know a person, the better you get to know them, and the more informed decision you can make about spending the rest of your life together.  If the H-bomb and I got married super fast, maybe we wouldn't have been capable of handling the ups and downs that came our way once we got to know each other better.  The truth is, when it comes to certain aspects of ourselves, we are different people than the people we thought we knew a year into the relationship.  So, in other words, why not wait?  On the flip side, my same friend was married once before and she and her husband had been together for nearly ten years before they made it official.  And split up about a year later.  So, waiting didn't seem to make a difference.  And then there's my parents who knew each other for two weeks and have been very happily married for almost forty years.  Yes, it was pseudo-arranged, but still.

And I mean, Kim and Kanye were barely dating before she got knocked up, although I guess they'd been friends for a really long time-- so perhaps that counts for something.   Anyway, where do you guys stand on the topic: better to dive right in or get your toes wet first? Comment below! 

3 comments:

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  2. I jumped head first into mine. I mean we had been friends but only for like 6 months...and he kinda sorta had a girlfriend...I feel like im digging a hole....maybe i should just submit the story. its post worthy. lol

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  3. you should send us the story! would love to hear it!

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