Wednesday, September 18, 2013

the one that got away (sort of)

Let me preface this post by saying that for me there is no "one that got away," because I'm very happy with who I ended up with.  This post is more about that particular guy or girl from our past who was all sorts of great and wanted to date us...but for some reason we weren't feeling it.  Maybe the attraction wasn't there, maybe we were still getting over an ex, maybe they just seemed a little too available.  Whatever it was, I sometimes look back at those situations and think: What was wrong with me?

Like my old friend Greg.  I wrote about him in this post three years ago, before anyone really read the blow off (click here to revisit).  Yes, I liked him first. And I pursued him with a newly made email address so he would know I was cool and liked Bob Dylan.   Like I said in the previous post, it worked.  And then the more we hung out, the more I felt like something was missing.  And then we had that horrible email debacle that forced the "are we dating?" conversation.

Looking back, I'm not sure what it was.  He was really attractive, smart, he had a whole young Ethan Hawke vibe going for him.  Yes, he was a bit pretentious and super opinionated-- but those were the kinds of guys I was into in my twenties.  Guys who read contemporary literature and had obscure taste in music.  Guys who introduced me to things like Chimay beer.  But those guys also had to be aloof and hard to read.  Greg was neither of those things. 

He once gave me this certificate as  Christmas gift.  Wait until you hear the adorable fine print in the back:

Highlights from the fine print (you can click on it to read in its entirety):
*The dater and the datee both are in agreement that each of the individual parts of the date shall be financed by the dater and that the datee shall have no guilt or concern about the monetary considerations for the date.
 *Receipt of the certificate in no way requires the datee to ever redeem it.
 *The certificate is non-transerable to other parties.
*The datee shall be escorted from and to her home by the dater, and the dater will provide all transportation.
*The dater, though he is at times rather inept at this sort of thing, promises, all in good fun, to give his best effort on the date, and make a serious effort to do things such as open doors for the datee or offer compliments, as opposed to comments such as "you look tired" which he made one more than one occasion in the past...the dater certainly thinks that whether the datee seems tired or not, for reasons pertaining to attitude or appearance, that she is still quite a lovely sight to behold.
*offer null and void in Idaho, Alabama, and Oklahoma.

Seriously, what was I thinking?  This is like the sweetest thing ever.

Maybe Greg's just the kind of guy only a woman in her thirties can fully appreciate.  I was barely twenty-three when we met, and at the time, I didn't know the bulk of my dating future was filled with a lot of flaky assholes.  But even though he was the one that got away (sort of) I'll still think of him fondly when I drink Chimay.  And I'm always keeping the gift certificate even if it's something he gave to all the girls.

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