Monday, October 21, 2013

And All I I Got Was Jennifer Love Hewitt's Sloppy Seconds...

I've already vented my frustrations about celebrities not trying to sleep with you, but that rant now plays second fiddle to my discovery this weekend.  I was wasting some time on US Weekly's website, naturally, when I happened to come across a retrospective of Jennifer Love Hewitt's romances. Obviously I clicked because if there's anyone that can make me feel better about myself it's a woman who's nickname is Jennifer Love Desperate.

There I am scrolling through.  Doesn't it seem like a million years ago since she dated Carson Daly? Or the brother from Boy Meets World for that matter?  Then there was her co-star and her other co-star.  And who can forget when she flew up to Napa to see Ben Flajnik after The Bachelor?  I continued feeling better about the shambles that is my romantic life until my jaw dropped after a scroll.

"Wait, I've made out with that guy!"  I had no idea that he was one of "Love's" many men.  Has my dating life gotten so bad that I'm now getting her sloppy seconds?  I immediately texted my BFF who promptly and curtly asked if I'd bothered to Google the guy because if I had I would've seen a multitude of pictures of them at the grocery store, on red carpets, and even attending The Golden Globes together.

"I mean we made out at a club.  I didn't feel like he was stalk-worthy," I told her.

So there you have it.  The only thing worse than not knowing where someone you've dated/kissed/slept with has been is knowing exactly where they've been.  Especially if it's with Jennifer Love Hewitt.



  1. well maybe he was with her when he made out with you and then dumped her because he knew there was so much better?

    (that's the 7th grade me, obviously)

  2. I hooked up with someone who dated her too! But it's worse because I def knew...

  3. But she would be the bigger catch for him, right?

  4. how do you know for sure she didn't have your sloppy seconds? also, remember how JLH apparently broke up with carson daly by releasing a statement through her publicist or something?