Tuesday, November 25, 2014
Boys only want love if it's torture?
Posted by saaara
As you may already know, I have a bit of an obsession with the song “Blank Space.” The video is gorgeous and I give Swift props for making fun of the fact that everyone thinks she’s a psychotic serial-monogamist. In the song, Tay-Tay muses that: "boys only want love if it's torture."
On this point, I have to argue that quite the opposite is true. Boys NEVER want love when it's torture. Men want things to be easy. All the time. In a survey of ten million men that I conducted yesterday, 9.9 million said the number one reason for ending a relationship was because things got "too hard." The remaining 100,000 said "they didn't want anything serious."
I don't know what Taylor is talking about. Maybe this is why none of her relationships have lasted very long? She's somehow under the impression that guys like it when she sends them belligerent texts or writes ultra-specific songs about them? No, just no.
We all know the quickest way to get eliminated on The Bachelor is to cry or start drama with the other girls or ask The Bachelor questions like "where do I stand?" (editor's note: unless you are super hot, then all bets are off). I swear if my husband ever filed for divorce, the number one reason would be "irreconcilable requests to do the dishes, walk the dog, and throw dirty laundry in the hamper instead of right next to the hamper." In fact, the glue that holds our relationship together may be the fact that I do the laundry. The point I'm trying to make is that dudes do not react well when their lives are over-complicated by their relationship. They only want to be tortured if it includes blindfolds, handcuffs, and a safe word.
And this might be why some guys are tempted to cheat. Their wives, kids, mortgage = tough shit. Their mistress = Nothing but good times.
So to Taylor Swift, please change the lyrics of your song to "boys only want love if it's easy." And to the three men reading this, do you disagree with the above? Do you prefer high drama and torment or peace and serenity and clean laundry? Comment below.