Tuesday, November 18, 2014
the reach out & ghost
Posted by 20 LA Wannabe
I ceased all forms of communication. I didn't even like a Facebook status and never once had the urge to send him a drunk text. All had been radio silent on both ends until last week when I'm about to go into a movie I receive a text:
"Hey, how are you?"
Really? That's what I get? I was annoyed and angry. If you're going to bother reaching out, I don't know, maybe some form of an apology or at least an acknowledgement that a significant period of time has passed since we last communicated would be appropriate. But no. One innocuous sentence. As I said, I was heading into a movie and refused to even deal with it until I got out. So, two hours later I weighed my options.
I could not respond. But to me, blatantly ignoring someone makes more of a statement. It's obvious that in 2014 we are all receiving the texts. There isn't some sort of technological malfunction. So, in my mind I'm showing him I care more by not responding at all, when I don't care. I decided I would reply to be polite, but I wasn't going to give him anything. I wasn't going to tell him it was good to hear from him, because it wasn't. I wasn't going to use exclamations or emojis. But I was also curious what he wanted.
"I'm good. How are you?" That's how I responded. It was to the point, no frills. It also opened the door for him to tell me why he was reaching out to me. But that didn't happen. Why? Because nothing happened. Nothing.
He never replied to my text. And this is why I don't understand. YOU reached out to ME. There had been zero communication prior to this. If you had something to say, why the hell didn't you say it? I'm not hurt, I'm just annoyed. Like let me be. We are not friends. If you're going to bother reaching out to an ex for some reason at least f-ing follow thru. I was just fine before I heard from you and I'm just fine now. I'm proud of myself that I can be so detached from him and the kind of bullshit he pulls. I'm not going to lie- part of me wanted to respond like 2 days later and say, "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?" But that wouldn't have done anything, so why bother? I shouldn't be surprised since this was his previous M.O. but at least that was while we were dating. It's almost more disrespectful to come back into someone's life and then disappear.
Please I beg of you guys and girls- if you're going to reach out to an ex, don't be a pussy. Have any of you ever reached out and ghosted? Male readers what the hell is the point of this?