Wednesday, April 8, 2015

it's not a break-up, it's a "break"

Yesterday it was reported that Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield are on a "break." Why this is in the news, I have no idea. Call me when they're actually over and then I'll write a BLOW OFF post about it. BUT the story did get me thinking, does this whole "taking a break" thing actually work? Is it not just a one way ticket to Break Up Land?

I never exercised the break clause in any of my relationships. We were either all-in or completely over, because I wouldn't have been okay with a guy declaring he wanted a "break" from me.  In fact, one boyfriend tried to initiate the "break" conversation and by the end of the discussion, we were dunzo. I'm just not the type who can sit around and twiddle my thumbs, wondering if my significant other's had enough time off or if he wants his freedom longer (AKA the all clear to have sex with someone else, because technically-- we were on a break).

To me, a break means mentally preparing someone for a full-fledged blow off. It's just the warm up round. I'm willing to bet there's less chance you end up with a person if you go on a break rather than  straight to the break-up. Time off gives the person the chance to get used to the idea of not being together. It's a less painful way to ease into a break-up. But if you cut the cord instead, it's a shock to the system. It's a "what the fuck did I just do, I can't live without this person" kind of trauma. A break-up (without a break) makes you realize what you had and---  voila, you get back together.

Plus, if you're not even married and feel the urge to take a break from your sig other, then you're most likely in the wrong relationship. ESPECIALLY if you're celebrities. All famous people ever say is that scheduling commitments kept them apart. So why would two famous people with scheduling commitments need to take a break from each other? Because one of them REALLY wants to fuck someone else without feeling bad about it.

As far as I'm concerned, a break is what you need during a work shift, not what you need from someone you supposedly love.  Perhaps it's best that all of the couples currently on "breaks" eventually call it quits. Cause let me tell you--- when you marry someone, the only time you really get a break from them is while you're pooping. And even then sometimes they talk to you through the bathroom door.

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