Tuesday, August 25, 2015
Dating rule: the plus one
Posted by saaara
A. Lock them down as your date even though the relationship is still new?
B. Go to the event solo. There's no guarantee you'll still be seeing each other in a couple months and you don't want to jinx it.
I would normally air on the side of caution and go with B, but I recently heard a genius dating rule when it comes to this dilemma. You should only plan as far ahead as the relationship has lasted. SO... if you've only been dating for two weeks, then you can only invite the person to an event that's two weeks away. If you've been dating for a month, you can plan a month ahead. You've been dating two months and it's June? Good news, you can plan the whole rest of the summer together. And once you've hit the one year mark, anything goes.
Personally, I think this is a safe rule to go by. It prevents you from planning dates and vacations that you'll only be depressed about if the relationship implodes and you have to cancel those plans. Birthday parties and work events are one thing, but keep in mind that wedding dates open up a can of worms. They bring up all kinds of fears and issues about commitment for guests in attendance. I know more than a few couples who've ended up having intense relationship conversations after going to a wedding together. The H-Bomb had a panic about two years into our relationship when we were at my cousin's wedding and every family member kept making those awful "When will it be your turn?" or "you guys are next" comments. It scared the shit out of him and I thought he was going to break up with me. So, if the relationship is in the very early stages-- I recommend flying solo or taking a friend to said wedding. There are many a couple in our wedding album that are no longer together now and that really bums me out.
What do you guys think when it comes to planning for the future with a relatively new relationship? Do you have any hard and fast rules about this? Comment below!