Wednesday, April 20, 2016

The Basic Bitch & the BLOW OFF

I know this is going to sound a little shallow, but...this post is dedicated to any girl who looked at a picture of their ex with a new girl and was like "WTAF?"

I've been hooking up with this guy on and off for years and the other night he posted a pic of his new gf on Facebook. She's this beautiful blonde and while it stung a little, I was like "OK I get it. Moving on." Then there's the guy I dated for years. The guy I gave my heart and soul to. The guy I was convinced was incapable of really being in love and completely opening his heart/life to anyone.

Like most girls in this situation, it turns out that he was actually only incapable of opening his heart to ME. You see he did fall in love. Now he's the part where I become not so nice. She's a plain Jane, a basic bitch, the kind of girl you wouldn't look twice at. I even showed a picture of her to my therapist and she said "I can see why you would be confused." That's why I pay her the big bucks.

Looks aren't everything, I get it. I'm sure to him she's beautiful. And I got pretty crazy after all the years of torture that I endured. I say endured because I am aware that I allowed it to go on. I'm not at all proud of how I acted, but I could barely get him to take me to dinner. He just took her to Europe. Yes, Europe.

At the end of the day, I'm grateful that he met her. If he hadn't, I fear our situation would have continued and I'd be stuck in the awful purgatory that I wasn't strong enough to take myself out of. Sometimes the universe does things for us that we are unable to do for ourselves. And while I'm sure he treats her better than he treated me because he seems to actually care about her, I am still not convinced he will ever be capable of the type of unconditional love that I would like to have.

Still, I would be lying if I said it wasn't a blow to my ego. I try not to think about him or let it bother me, but sometimes I still have to ask whyyy. Fortunately, my wise best friend had an answer. "She's a Ford. Safe and durable. People who own Fords own them forever. And no one is ever jealous of someone who drives a Ford."

So there ya have it. I'm sorry if I've offended any Ford owners or basic bitches. You can hate me for writing this post, or you can admit that you've secretly been there. There's not much that is worse than being dumped...Oh, yes there is. Being dumped and then replaced with a basic bitch.


  1. I know what's up... The guy has had his share of attractive women, saw they were more often than not boring, and decided to get someone interesting who didn't worry about how they looked all the time nor secretly compare themselves to other women based on appearances exclusively.
    I'm a guy and totally get this guy's frame of mind. This new woman is a woman he can actually live with and be at ease with. No pretenses.
    And all women turn to pot after 40 anyway. So who you decide to grow old with should in no way be based on looks. A saggy tit is a saggy tit. A guy has to get used to the sagginess regardless...

    1. Ok this comment is infuriating on so many levels. I agree that she probably made him feel more at ease. But just because you are attractive you are boring? Um not so much. Attractive people go to the playboy mansion, the hottest clubs and coachella while basic bitches stay home and tend to the balding men who feel more content with them. And all women turn to pot after 40? I hate you.

  2. I don't think the term 'basic bitch' is being used properly here... going to Urban Dictionary to find out... standby...

  3. A guy I know went once to the Playboy mansion, he was a well known journalist, picked up a young hottie (nowhere near 40) and couldn't get it up. She was dull. She knew how to dress, put on makeup, run around and laugh like a teenager, etc. but not much else.

  4. i wouldn't be caught dead at coachella or the playboy mansion. if that makes me a basic bitch, then so be it.

  5. I kind of created my own definition of basic bitch, which is a plain jane girl you wouldn't look twice it, dependable, safe, convenient, sort of boring. Hate if you want, but most of us have thought this about someone our ex has dated, be honest people.

    PS: I happened to have gone to the Playboy Mansion and Coachella. They are both super fun, not gonna lie... Not that it makes you a basic bitch if you haven't gone or don't want to. Just saying, SUPER FUN